If only, your vision would look upon me. If only, you could hear the sounds of a heart break. Silently watching over you, silently waiting for a miracle. Silently letting myself, be like air.

Everyone’s eating, talking, laughing, tonite is such a joy. The cornermost me, is laughing together with the rest. The onions at the bottom of the plate are just like me, forever the flavouring. Secretly watching you, secretly hiding myself. If you are willing to peel open my heart, layer by layer by layer. You will discover, you will be shocked. You are my most suppressed, deepest secret.

If you are willing to peel open my heart, layer by layer by layer. Your nose will run, you will tear. If only you can hear me, see my wholeheartedness. Hearing you talk about you and your many other ‘him’ and the blossoming loves. Me and my hopelessness act very amused. I’m just like an onion, forever just the supporting actor. How i wish to have with you, a second of our own story.

11:06 PM

Had my first RP lesson today. Met quite a number of familar faces there. During lectures, the 'Z' Monster was there to attack us all along. Oh yawn...

And YEAH! I expressed interest in becoming an RP K-9 dog handler! Hope I will get selected and it will be some German Shepherd doggy style fun yo~! Haha.


Let me walk you by the sea
To breathe in the cool salty air
The breeze will caress your soft silky hair
While I look into your eyes and just stare
Wishing that you're belonged to me once again..

11:35 PM

Posting's out!

Your vocation is REGIMENTAL POLICEMAN.

Special Instruction: No Camera Handphone is allowed. You are required to report in Smart No. 4 Uniform with your writing materials. You are not required to bring along the SAF issued items given during BMT. This is a stay-out course.

HAHAHA~! STAY-OUT COURSE!

3:22 PM

Boredom kills me inside out.

This knife's cutting up my soul, that baton gives me another blow.

I just wanna SCREAM.

11:10 PM

Finally cracked it. Solved it and end it. Glad that the heartless soul of mine told me to escape the fate just in time. Things change, so do humans.

Time has come for me to realize. All those things I loved I now despise.

FUCKING DESPISED.

2:52 AM

POP LOH! POP LOH! POP LOH!

Farewell BMTC School 2, Mohawk Coy.

1209

9:06 PM

Attend C for 3 days. Doc's consultation fee and medicine chokes up an amount of $62. But to escape 3 days from camp its totally worth it. That means if I were to round off, its equivalent to buying a day for $20 each. $20 divided by 24 hours equals to about $0.80 per hour which is also about the same hourly pay of a recruit in army. Miserable pathetic pay, worst than working at any fast food outlet. Will you guys out there buy an hour for $0.80? I bet they would. Freedom is gold to all NS men. Time's really money.

Though I was sick, it felt so good to lie on your own bed, looking up and around your own comfortable room. But I believe good things always come to an end. Heading back to camp in 7 hours time. Here comes that stinging pain feeling again. Fuck.

12:11 AM

This song best describes my situation now. Just wanna let you know that you're the best I ever had.


Vertical Horizon - Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning)

So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring

Nothing's quite the same now
I just say your name now

Chorus
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't want me back
You're just the best I ever had

So you stole my world
Now I'm just a phony
Remembering the girl
Leaves me down and lonely

Send it in a letter
Make yourself feel better

Chorus
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't need me back
You're just the best I ever had

And it may take some time to
Patch me up inside
But I can't take it so I
Run away and hide
And I may find in time that
You were always right
You're always right

So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring

What was it you wanted
Could it be I'm haunted

Chorus
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
I don't want you back
You're just the best I ever had
The best I ever had
The best I ever

11:21 PM